Thursday, October 24, 2013

HELP! Why Am I Feeling This Way?

Have you ever been bombarded with thoughts? I'm not talking about the normal kind of thinking we all do each day.  These cut in as you are praying and they begin to consume you.

Well yesterday I began experiencing these: depression, negativity, self-defeating thoughts, self-destructive thoughts, inability to concentrate, distractions (especially in trying to read God’s Word), feeling constantly overwhelmed, hopelessness, gloom, confusion.  It came about suddenly!!

 I couldn't understand why this came about.  I went to bed early in hopes that when I fall asleep it would stop but they didn't.  I tossed and turned.  It was sleepless night.

This morning I woke up feeling drained with the same thoughts and feelings.  I couldn't bare it anymore because it was overwhelming.  Therefore I closed my bedroom door, saturated the atmosphere with some worship music, extended my arms up to the LORD in surrender - pleading for relief and the moment I did something began to happen.

There was an outpouring of tongues that followed that I can hear myself but could not stop. Holy Spirit was interceding on my behalf (Romans 8:26). I didn't know what to pray for because I didn't know where these thoughts and feelings were coming from.  It was so powerful that it had me hunched over and wailing as if something was being pulled out of me.

When I felt the release, I asked Holy Spirit what was happening to me and He said "I was pouring you out".  He was purging me of all those harsh and grievous thoughts that were weighing down in my spirit.  The spirit of oppression was trying to re-attach itself. The enemy is very cunning yet he cannot do anything without God's permission but it was up to me to come before the Father and seek Him. Although I was not aware of what brought this on, Holy Spirit brought the revelation as to how he gained entrance.  In that revelation was a word of caution that I was falling back into old familiar patterns with a certain issue I dealt with before and the enemy was trying to maximize on it.

I thank God for the freedom, the relief that comes along with it and for the warning and wisdom so that I may remain in victory!!

Why am I sharing this with you?  Because I want to make you aware of the spirit of oppression.

OPPRESSION: a sense of heaviness or obstruction in the body or mind, weight down, to burden spiritually or mentally by abuse of power or authority. (Webster’s Seventh New Collegiate Dictionary)

If you are struggling with thoughts as what I described from my own personal experience, do not delay.  First, repent of the sin that opened the door if you are aware of it.  If not seek God for the revelation. Command the devil to leave in the name of Jesus. AND PRAISE GOD FOR THE VICTORY AND REMAIN IN IT!  :)

We also know that we encounter spiritual warfare BUT .....

“If God is for us, who is against us? He who did not spare His own Son, but delivered Him over for us all, how will He not also with Him freely give us all things?” (Romans 8:31)